The Complicated Relationship
If it’s not the most
taboo subject in the modern India, it is most certainly frowned upon and
considered as an utterly uncomfortable and useless topic to talk about. So for
the sake of creating a new fuss and bombarding my boredness with a fresh set of
puns, here goes my yet another irrelevant and censored blog post about:
Problems men have from ‘untimely
erections’ or as you might have heard ‘man wood’ or ‘involuntary standing
ovation’ by your honour Mr. John Pee-Pee.
Now the way we go about
sex education in this country is appalling. I mean, until about I was 13, I was
convinced that my ‘garden of good and evil’ (balls) is used to store pee. You
can imagine what kind of other impending issues I might have with Mr Pee-Pee.
I mean, this has to be
the most complicated relationship a guy will ever have. You might have heard
them saying …. “oh… I have a very “complicated” relationship with her/him”. Well
obviously, they haven’t tried peeing with an erection.
Talking about sex
education and women always yelping about their period problems, well I surveyed
100 women and asked them what kind of problems they face while peeing and you
won’t eberrr believe, 98 of them said: "How the hell did you get in
here?"
Anyways let’s keep this
discussion about men problems only.
So what’s with it
showing ‘up’ for work, without invitation, every-single-morning when you wake
up, huh! I mean you haven’t activated any launch sequence and yet the rocket is
ready to burst into flames trying to come out of the ‘Pajama-Hemisphere’. And I
think I don’t even need to tell you how awkward and un-comfortable it is to
hold on to your thing for 5 minutes (or more) on the bed, before you can take a
piss, doing all kinds of breathing exercise to get the blood flow out of it.
I tell you, this one
time, the bad-ass-stubborn I am, I tried to pee regardless of how colossus this
Goliath-Python was looking ‘above’ from the ginormous hippie bush I have
supported, at me angrily ‘all-red’. But I showed him no mercy, I went into the
bathroom, stood above the iron throne, looked down and I peed so freakin hard. But,
as you might imagine, evidently, that upward-parabolic-stream short-circuited
the bulb hanging above in the bathroom. Go figure.
So next time if you're
having trouble making the ‘wee-wacky’ because of the ‘woo-hoo’, just stay put
and admire this behemoth creature and give him his due respect, that he obviously
so desperately craves for.
*rolls eyes*
Aghhh !
PS: If tying a Nimbu
Mirchi helps ward off evil. I think men should never have to suffer from any
evil. I am jusst saying.